Domestic Violence: Who Are The Abusers?
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You can never tell in an instant if a person is an abuser of domestic violence. The abuser has different persona, and they aren't easy to spot. Your friendly-looking neighbor, who always goes to church, could be an abuser. As much as they can, they will try to hide their victims, forcing them to wear clothes that can cover the bruises.
Abuse is never an accident. A person totally have the control over his/her will to hurt a partner. Being drunk, stressed-out due to work, or under the influence of recreational drugs doesn't validate the abusers' actions. Abuse is an intentional act to gain control over the other, no matter what the cost is. Be it physical, sexual, emotional or psychological abuse, it is damaging and can ruin a relationship, one's mind, body and soul.
Abusers often have low self-esteem. They feel better about themselves when they are able to control someone. It gives them a false sense of power and might. They do not take responsibility for their actions. They are very immature. They may even blame the victim for causing the violence. In most cases, men abuse female victims. It is important to remember that women can also be abusers and men can be victims.
Abusers have different persona, depending upon their backgrounds and experiences in life. The only common about them is the choice to gain control at the expense of their partners. Abusers use many tactics, one is being manipulative, usually distorts his/her controlling behavior as if he was just raising a concern. You aren't good in making decisions, as the abuser would always say, so he/she can control you, up to the victims finances... until they totally cannot move freely.
The abuser's expectations from his/her partner and children are unrealistic. Expecting them to do things in a very particular manner, and if they don't, it gives him the reason to punish them badly. The abuser is jealous about everyone and everything, even the family, that surrounds his/her victim. Accusing the family of being a menace that can damage their relationship.
The victims are always to blame, that's the point of view of the abusers. The abuser accepts no mistakes from his end, it's always on the end of the partner, making the victim his perfect and convenient scapegoat. Abusers force their victims to do sexual activity it prefers, irregardless of the partners condition. Whether the partner has just given birth, or ill.. the abuser doesn't give a care. If not satisfied, the abuser may assault the victim.
The abusers use foul language to hurt and degrade the victims. Calling the victim stupid in front of their friends, relatives and acquaintances. Wanting to show off to all the people around them that the purpose of the partner is to serve him/her. The abusers expectations from the victim is in this manner: Serve three meals a day, clean the house, and give them satisfaction at night. Selfish and inconsiderate, that's what the abuser is. The abuser may even threaten the victim to take away their kids, just to get what he/she wants.
Article Source: Articlelogy.com
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